Hanukah - Passover: A Reader's Irreverence

Contributed by a reader who wishes to remain anonymous

New Holiday

The Jewish holiday of Hanu-Passover got started this year:
For Lo! The Jews returned to the holy land, and there was a terrible Hamsin - for the Lord God Jehovah hath punished their multitudinous sins with a great hot wind that blew in from the desert.
And because there had been no forewarning, there was no time to prepare beer before Passover.
And in the temple of the house there remained but one bottle of beer.
But Lo! The Lord hath caused a great miracle to come to pass for the righteous of Israel -- and the beer that was so have sufficed for one day was multiplied and lasted for all 8 days of the Passover.
And the people drank and thirsted no more and gave thanks.