Metrocles, who was very devoted to his sister, started to exert pressure on his parents to allow the marriage, stressing that, although in human terms Crates was only the son of Ascondas, an obscure Theban, in terms of wisdom and culture he was a worthy son of Apollo, the god of light and truth. The parents began to soften... especially the mother, who was secretly very proud of her son's progress under Crates' tutelage... but they still insisted that the decision could not be left to Hipparchia herself; Crates must be consulted as to his own feelings and intentions in the matter.

Hearing this, Metrocles breathed more easily: he knew quite well that Crates was by no means indifferent to Hipparchia. Even Crates' brief conversation with Hipparchia had convinced the Cynic of the girl's immense natural intelligence and independent spirit. "This is the woman who would suit me perfectly as a wife," Crates had said to himself, although he had been a confirmed bachelor until that moment. As a Cynic, devoted to equality and simplicity, Crates placed no value upon Hipparchia's wealth or rank: it was the woman herself who appealed to him, her delightful combination of innocence and sensuality, her refreshing frankness, her quest for wisdom. Therefore, the idea of joining in matrimony with Hipparchia was extremely attractive to Crates... Nevertheless, painfully recognizing his own poverty and plainness, the great philosopher had hesitated to approach Hipparchia's family... He surely intuited what their reaction would have been.

Yet one fine day Crates received a visit from Hipparchia's father who, although he expressly wished the philosopher to discourage Hipparchia, promised not to interfere further if his daughter was not to be dissuaded. There followed the famous encounter between those two seekers after truth, Hipparchia and Crates, neither one of whom could ever dissimulate... Crates appeared before Hipparchia in his immaculate but threadbare homespun cloak, which he then removed; his only other garment was the equally spotless but much-mended short tunic that he wore below. "Here I stand before you" he said, "the bridegroom you have desired. These worn-out old garments, my humble house, the few coins my students pay me... I teach not to become wealthy, but to mold responsible citizens... are all that I possess. Beyond a life of very modest means, I can offer you nothing as a husband. Nothing but philosophy, and all the joy that this provides... What do you say, Hipparchia? Do you still wish to marry me?"

Hipparchia's response has not been recorded by the laconic, unsentimental Diogenes Laertius; but it is not difficult to imagine, as we know quite well the joyous sequel to this encounter. The romantic girl must have been filled with emotion by Crates' honesty and by his oblique offer of marriage, in which no rejection was implied: she had certainly been fearing that the illustrious Crates, one of the most renowned philosophers of the age, would not deign to accept a nonentity such as herself! But now, taking courage, Hipparchia must have probed Crates concerning his own sentiments: "Do you wish to marry ME? Do you feel for me a love as deep as that which stirs inside me, for you? If so... then I will be yours forever... For I seek not material wealth, but those riches of the spirit which only YOU can teach me."

Crates' response was certainly positive, for he and Hipparchia were married in Athens shortly afterward (326 B.C.), without any further opposition on the part of Hipparchia's family. The bride immediately went to live in Crates' little house, as tidy, plain and unpretentious as he himself was. Hipparchia gladly adopted her husband's simple lifestyle, his dislike of pomp and luxury, even his manner of dressing in a heavy cloak wrapped twice around the body. She became his eager student, his helpmate in all things. As Hipparchia grew in knowledge and wisdom, her confidence as an orator increased; soon, she accompanied Crates to all his symposia and lectures, not hesitating to take lively part in the discussions and to offer incisive opinions of her own. While still in her early twenties, Hipparchia was already recognized as a Cynic philosopher of great worth. Even her stern parents could not help feeling proud of her! What they could not approve of, however, were their daughter's very open viewpoints on male/female equality: for both Hipparchia and Crates fought actively for women's rights in that male-dominated society. As the first truly liberated woman and first feminist in the ancient world, Hipparchia strove to shatter the chains of social and sexual restrictions by which women were bound; she and Crates, although staunchly faithful to each other throughout all their many years of marriage, propagated the concept of free love. To prove that sex is not sinful, they even made love in public without shame, claiming that doing so was the most natural act in the world. Hipparchia encouraged Greek and non-Greek women to stand up for their rights, to speak out boldly and without trepidation, to choose their own husbands or lovers just as she had done; to unite against all types of male tyranny and injustice, claiming their rightful place as CITIZENS in society, in the realms of politics, public administration, commerce, the arts and humanities.

Crates and Hipparchia had a son named Pasicles, whom they brought in the Cynic manner, instructing him from earliest childhood in the highest ideals of social equity, civic and human rights, love of mankind. Both Hipparchia and her husband lived long, full lives, and after death were greatly honored by that same Athenian society which had hardly understood them while they lived. It is only in recent times that the envigorating, liberating message of Crates and Hipparchia has been comprehended, and widely accepted throughout the world.

Article © 2002 Maria Jamil Fasolo